A blogging friend of mine, Sarah, from Our Journey, just blogged about how she is always the organizer for get togethers and if she didn't organize them, would anybody invite her to do things?
I completely feel the same way as her! If I don't put forth the effort, would anyone be calling/texting me to set something up? I try my best to text or call my friends just to check in with them, but rarely do I have someone initiating a call or text with me. Have we gotten so lazy in the new technological world that we've stopped putting effort into relationships?
Or is it me?
I can't help but have my feelings hurt at times when I'm the one doing all the work. I'm the one constantly calling and asking someone to do something. And here's where my little heart hurts just a little more. If they aren't calling me, are they really my "true friends"? Should I be investing in my time and efforts into someone else? Or are we just friends because of our children?
I want to be invested in. I want my soul to be fed by amazing friends who know "me" and not just my children. I want the conversations to be good for the heart and if I wasn't putting forth the effort, would anyone want to invest in me?
I know being a mama is exhausting and our days are wrapped up in our kids, but mamas, we can't forget to continue investing in the relationships that keep going.
1 is an awfully lonely number and on days where I don't leave the house and it's just Raegan and I, it would be nice to receive a text from a friend who just wanted to check up on me.
So I challenge you, who will you invest in today?
This is such a great reminder! Thanks for posting!!
ReplyDeleteIt seems like several close friends and I have lost touch over the years mainly because they went on to have kids and are just busy with them. I totally understand that but it's the same way, if I don't text them they likely wouldn't check on me.
ReplyDeleteYou are not alone! I am in the exact same boat with you. I actually just sent my family and close friends an email asking them to keep in touch more regularly because I was feeling like I was the only one reaching out to communicate. It was well received and I felt relieved to have finally said something.
ReplyDeleteI love hearing from friends and really appreciate when others reach out to me. Being a mom with a little one is tricky on friendships - I could completely relate to the questions you were asking about current friends. I just pray that I can make some friends that are really invested in our friendship in my area since we have lived in our city less than a year. Making new friends as an adult is challenging and finding new couple friends is even harder. Thanks for the reminder to invest in relationships and to be a good friend.
This is a fabulous post, and a great reminder. I have unfortunately lost friends to the time demands of children and the unwillingness to put in the effort. I have found that the friendships worth keeping are the ones where both parties put in the time.
ReplyDeleteOur Little Miracles
It is so hard to maintain friendships. I used to be the organizer and pulled away when we were going through treatments. Now. I just worry that I won't be able to find the time to do everything - work, commute, time with our lil, family, friends, exercise, clean and cook. Sigh!
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry you feel like this girl but I also know the feeling all too well - it is sad that we always initiate love and care and friendships and don't get it in return... Wish we didn't live so far apart! x
ReplyDeletegood words...i feel like you were writing thoughts in my head. so many moms around me are in MOPs groups or have play dates, but what about a working mom, also? Then you deal with guilt like, I'm gone all day at work and I need to spend time with my Kid-os, but when is my love tank gonna get filled? priorities. balance. authenticity. ugh.. Big words I need to work on.
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